Why Men Pull Away … In Relationships?
Why men pull away seems to be a mysterious relationship secret for many women…
So, why? Why do men pull away? That is the question!
No doubt, you’ve most likely experienced a time when you felt like your guy was pulling away from you. And the the crazy thing is that sometimes it happens right after you’ve had a great time together and you thought you both were really starting to connect at a deeper level!
This can leave your head spinning trying to figure out what the heck is going on…am I right?
When you question why men pull away you start asking yourself if it is because…
I moved to fast? or something I did? or is it just him? or is he losing interest in me?
Feelings of concern and panic flood through you from not knowing why it’s happening, or what you can do to stop it.
Why Men Pull Away?
Let’s take a look at five insights into this question and what you can do about it…
Keep in mind: Men have strong feelings just like women, but unlike women, men generally aren’t able to process their feelings and act on them like women are.
If someone asks us why we are upset, we usually can communicate and explain why. And we are are also usually glad to talk about it.
However, with guys, they most likely can’t explain why they are feeling like they are. And on top of it, they will be even more upset trying to explain what they don’t even understand themselves.
What can you do if you’re man is pulling away and distancing himself from you?
1. DON’T FREAK OUT
First, don’t freak out! Stay grounded and maintain your own strength and peace, and react using your brain and not your feelings. Don’t start putting yourself down and taking all the blame. Do something positive. Go for a walk – dance to your favorite song and sing at the top of your lungs!
2. GIVE BREATHING ROOM
Second, it is possible that your man may actually be really into you. He may just need some breathing room to process the idea of a long-term commitment with you, or of taking the relationship to the next level. He may be feeling insecure and defensive, and having thoughts that he’s not good relationship material – that he doesn’t measure up. Some things just need a little breathing room. So let that happen and then choose your next move while trying to figure out why men pull away.
3. BRAIN CHEMISTRY
Third, understand that brain chemistry plays an important role in all of our lives, but varies between men and women. Dopamine is a key neurotransmitter that gives guys energy, makes them feel good and happy, motivates, and gives them clarity. In this mode they are better able to offer love and romance.
Men thrive on challenges and competition because it helps raise their dopamine “feel good” levels. So when dating, the challenge of courting a woman causes their dopamine levels to rise, but then it falls as the challenge is gone. This is one reason why men pull away.
So, how do you help trigger your man’s dopamine levels? Stroke his ego, make him feel needed and appreciated. Let him solve some problems your struggling with or fix something around the house. Play a little hard to get. Let him watch that football game and let him go play basketball with his buddies.
4. LOVED FOR THE REAL HIM
Fourth, a man wants to be loved for the real him. So help him sense that deep down, you are into the real him. Asking a man questions that sound like you are sizing him up and comparing him to others will only make him want to pull away. Ask him about why he likes the work he does and why he is interested in the other hobbies, and things in his life. He will start to build a strong connection to you without even being able to explain why.
5. A JOURNEY TO ACCOMPLISH
Fifth, every man feels deep down he’s on a journey to accomplish something in life. And when he feels like someone is hindering him, he gets a internal yellow or red light signal that causes him to pull away. He may not even realize it is happening. On the other hand, he gets a green light if he feels someone is helping him.
So find out who this man is that you are with…and be for him and not against him. Think about it. If you ultimately want to be a committed couple, you have to take steps that unify the two of you and move you both together in the same direction. You have to know what direction he is heading, and you have to want to go with him.
You’re next step: Stay grounded and be confident in who you are. Continue to work on yourself as you get to know your man better. Don’t let any of the reasons why men pull away make your head spin.
Of course, you may find you are going opposite directions and the reason he has pulled away is a signal letting you know it is time to move on. Take this as a positive signal, because you are valuable and don’t want to waste time in a relationship once it is determined to clearly be wrong.
Go now, and watch this great video that explains the “Man’s Magic Traffic Signal” – it will better help you understand why men do what they do, including the mysterious secret: why men pull away in relationships.
You can find this article resource in printable PDF form…
here at Slideshare: Why Men Pull Away and What to Do When Your Guy Pulls Away!
here at Scribd: Why Men Pull Away What if Your Guy Pulls Away
Relationship Love Help ~ And may you put the love back in your relationship! ~
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